Thursday, May 30, 2013
Loving myself... TODAY!
I have many more ranty things to post, but I thought I'd start here again with something positive. It does unfortunately again deal with the issue of FAT. I hope that someday - someday very soon in fact - I will stop even thinking about my size and just LIVE MY LIFE. But, for the moment, I still have a few issues to deal with and a few things to tell this superficial society of ours before I can drop the subject.
So... positive. Over the last couple of years I have been getting healthy. At present, my vital signs are all in the 'normal' range, my doctors describe me as healthy, and I feel GREAT. I have plenty of energy, I eat well, sleep well, and get plenty of exercise. I have learnt to limit my indulgence of the tasty things my body doesn't need to rare times and small quantities. I am still improving this, but I'm pretty damn pleased with my current equilibrium. I achieved this state very slowly and naturally. I never went on a 'diet', I never paid a cent to a weight-loss company. I did this on my own and I did it in a way that allowed me to just continue my life and relationships along the entire journey. It is not the only way to get healthy, but it's the way I did it and I'm proud of what I've achieved.
My BMI has reduced from where it was, but it is still high. But that doesn't matter. I am now a firm advocate of the 'Health at Every Size' approach and intend to follow this life-affirming path into the future (or 'going forward' as we say now - grrr.) Embracing good-health has not only given me the direct benefits of a healthier body, but it has also offered me a wonderful antedote to the fat-haters. Because if anyone tries to tell me I should lose weight for my health, I know they are wrong. They can no longer claim that as their excuse for 'worrying about me'. All they have left is the truth - that they want me to lose weight for their own aesthetic tastes. And to that attitude I have always been immune. You want to tell me how to live my life for your own superficial reasons? Well, you know exactly where you can shove that idea. :)
But, well, I'm not quite, not 100%, happy with my new situation. I had sort of hoped that by getting healthy I would also achieve my ideal figure. And that has not really occurred. So this is the final hurdle I must overcome - my disappointment with my healthy body's appearance. (The final personal hurdle that is, there are still many things society needs to fix, never fear!) For a completely together and mentally-healthy future, I must accept that this is the body I am to live with. This, NOW, is my healthy weight, my healthy body, and so I must learn to love it.
So, to 'put it out there' as they say, I offer these affirmations of my reality.
I will never be slim because:
- I am already healthy.
- I am content with my current balance of indulgence to nutrition, and activity to laziness. My lifestyle works for me emotionally and socially as well as physically.
- Cream and butter make things taste better, they are therefore necessary occasional indulgences.
- A pork roast with crackling and all the trimmings is one of the most spectacular inventions of all time. I refuse to live a life that entirely rejects spectacular inventions.
- Running is unpleasant. It is bad for your joints, sweat-inducing and therefore inconvenient, and mostly unnecessary. Also, it is unpleasant.
- Counting calories is one of the most boring activities on the planet.
- Reading and researching and writing and talking are all best enjoyed sitting on a comfortable sofa. And they are all best enjoyed often.
- Wine is delicious and induces important conversations.
- My husband loves my body just the way it is, and my husband is by far the best person on the planet, and the one I most often want to be naked with.
- People who don't like fat people are superficial morons. I don't like superficial morons.
And being fat forever is just fine, because:
- Healthy fat people may live longer than healthy slim people.
- Fat-hating is disgusting and needs to be stamped out. This can only be achieved by fabulous fat-people being fat and fabulous.
- I personally find too many curves far sexier than too few, including on my own body.
- People who spend all day thinking and talking about their bodies are dull and unpleasant. People who enjoy life are fun. I want to be around fun people, and be a fun person myself.
- Fat fashion is fun. Being part of the sassy, self-loving, fat-gang is fun.
- Self-loving fat people can step off the constantly-worrying-about-body-size treadmill, and just BE.
- Fat people are the best people to cuddle.